


both thieves and heroes wear masks (some are more ridiculous than the others)

by Yukari



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Actual Phantom Thief Ren, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, actual Detective Goro, comedy?, inspired by a tumblr prompt from ages ago, it was supposed to be a joke fic but then shuake happened, it's only half serious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 20:59:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19070572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yukari/pseuds/Yukari
Summary: After Goro let out another irritated sigh, the barista of his favorite cafe finally couldn’t stop himself from breaking the silence.“So, what was it this time, detective? Because something happened, right?” Ren asked. He couldn’t hide the hint of curiosity in his voice.“Are you trying to tell me you haven’t seen the news today?” He hoped he didn’t sound as tired as he felt.“Uh, no. I was actually waiting for you to tell me in person. It’s more interesting than these clickbait articles, you know?”Goro Akechi is a young detective investigating a group of thieves who commit their crimes while dressed as fictional characters.He accidentally gets a little more out of it than he bargained for.





	both thieves and heroes wear masks (some are more ridiculous than the others)

**Author's Note:**

> It's not necessarily a birthday themed fic, I still wanted to contribute to celebrating Goro's birthday somehow. Happy birthday, special boy!!

Goro wasn’t really sure how he ended up like this.

At first he was sure he was assigned to this case just because he was young, ‘inexperienced’, and his coworkers didn’t seem to like him much. Of course he’d end up with the joke case, one that wouldn’t even look like an achievement after solving. The one person who didn’t mind him as much, Sae, even told him to just treat this as the beginner’s difficulties, that soon they’d grow bored of treating him like a rookie and nobody would mention this mess. 

But here he was, a few months later, with said case still unsolved and growing to the rank of a nation-famous phenomenon due to both his superiors never listening to him, and simply because… the people he was chasing were just this good at slipping between his fingers.

After he let out another irritated sigh, the barista of his favorite cafe finally couldn’t stop himself from breaking the silence. 

“So, what was it this time, detective? Because something happened, right?” Ren asked. He couldn’t hide the hint of curiosity in his voice.

Goro smiled at him slightly. He was quite endearing, and always seemed ready to listen to Goro’s complaints and stories from his work. In addition to that… he was just really easy to be around, and cafe Leblanc was a relaxing place with the best coffee in the entire Tokyo.

“Are you trying to tell me you haven’t seen the news today?” He hoped he didn’t sound as tired as he felt. 

“Uh, no. I was actually waiting for you to tell me in person. It’s more interesting than these clickbait articles, you know?” Ren laughed a little, refilling his now empty cup. He was doing it automatically at this point, that’s how often Goro was showing his face there. 

“I’m flattered that you find my storytelling entertaining,” he replied, then sighed again, reaching for his phone and opening the photo of the criminal that was the topic of their conversation. “Just look at this first.”

“Ah, Phoenix Ranger Featherman R?” Ren’s gray eyes momentarily sparkled with excitement. “I have to say, this time the replicas of the costumes are really well made.” 

“Don’t tell me… are you a fan? I was convinced it’s a show for children.” 

“My little sister would skin you alive if she heard that,” Ren hummed, not at all bothered by this attempted mockery. 

“Oh? How much younger this little sister is?” Goro asked. This was sort of amusing.

“Two years.”

“I see. I can see now why would this young adult be offended by calling a show she liked ‘childish’. I’ll make sure to do this again if I ever meet her.”

“Hey, if she actually attacks you, I might not be able to protect you,” the black-haired man said with a frown. “She might be a midget, but she can be really passionate.” 

“So you’d try to defend me instead of helping your sister? Some sibling solidarity.”

“I’d take a bullet for you, Goro, but Futaba is a natural disaster.” Ren let out that quiet laugh of his again, and Goro had a really hard time convincing himself his heart didn’t just skip a beat. 

So what if he had a tiny crush on this beautiful man? It wasn’t a crime, and Ren’s playful nature wasn’t exactly a turn off. He was funny, intelligent and caring, and… 

He was Goro’s only friend. Even if they became friends mostly because of his addiction to caffeine, it still counted.

“Don’t promise something that will never happen,” he muttered, deciding it’s the right time to go back to the topic. “In the end, they got away again, leaving me with nothing.”

“Nothing?” 

“Nothing, aside from this.” Goro smiled to himself, knowing that Ren would already pick up the pattern in that group’s actions. He reached inside his case and pulled out a red and black calling card. “Again, it’s addressed to me. It’s different than the ones they send to their targets though.”

“Is this even okay for you to show this to me?” Ren asked, taking the card from him and giving him a worried glance. 

“Are you planning on reporting this to my superiors?” He smirked when Ren shook his head. “Then I don’t see any issues. They are not aware of the double calling cards anyway.”

“...you surprise me everyday, detective. But I expected no less from you.”

“You expected me to hide evidence from my boss?”

“Yes… and no,” Ren said, choosing his words carefully. “I just... expected you to be the kind of person to follow your personal vision of what is right.”

Goro blinked, a little surprised. He couldn’t deny this statement. Actually, Ren hit the nail on the head. From anyone other than him this sentence would definitely sound like a mockery, an implication of Goro’s self-righteousness, but from Ren… it sounded like quiet support. Like faith put in his judgement. 

“...is that so,” he said after a moment of silence. “Well, aren’t a little too good at analysing people in your surrounding?” 

“Years of practice. And you only confirmed I was right. Anyway, please, continue.” 

“Aren’t you going to read the calling card?” 

“Ah, right, I forgot about it…” Ren fixed his glasses and moved his gaze to the card he was still holding. The content of the message written there wasn’t long, soon he looked up again. “It looks like… you got yourself a secret admirer.”

“Not really that secret. It’s signed.” Goro pointed at the codename written under the message. “Joker. Most likely the leader, so, on this photo it would be… him. The red one is usually considered the main character, right?”

“Yhm, true. But what if it’s just a decoy?”

“It’s possible. I don’t want to take anything for the certain truth without confirming it first,” Goro said, smiling confidently. “That’s why I’m going to catch him. Him and his band of cosplaying fools.”

Ren for a moment stared at the calling card without saying anything. He had those moments… Truth be told, Ren couldn’t be considered a talkative person. At first it was mainly Goro trying to engage him in a conversation, and Ren answering in nods and short sentences that sometimes would consist of only one word. It changed with time though. Now it didn’t feel like a monologue anymore… but he’d still have his moments of silence. 

Finally, Ren poked at the card.

“What was here?” 

“Ah, that. Classic Joker. It was a memory card, containing the same files that were stolen by them, if I were to believe him,” Goro replied. “Every single file on it could serve as a catalyst for arresting the assumed victim. They’re incredibly incriminating, and if I don’t do anything about it first, Joker will reveal them to the general public.” 

“Then… are you going to do anything about it?” 

Goro sighed.

“This way of communicating is very one-sided. I wish I knew what my time limit was, since confirming all of this with legal sources that won’t endanger my career is talking some time.”

Ren turned the card around, and after not finding anything new that would attract his attention, he returned it to Goro with a smile. A smile so beautiful that he momentarily forgot what he was talking about.

“I think… that if he sends you something like this, he trusts you enough not to hurry you,” he said. “Just do your best, detective.” 

“Again with your analysing people, this time someone you don’t even know?”

Ren tapped his finger against his lips, thinking for a moment. And looking cute, but that’s another thing entirely. 

“I’d like to believe the phantom thieves you’re chasing are not evil,” he stated. “From what you’ve been telling me, they show a lot of trust in you, and they only target other criminals. But at the same time they’re clearly teasing you, so who knows?”

“It doesn’t really matter. I’m still going to catch them, and unmask the Red Featherman… or whatever mask he assumes next.”

“Because it’s your job, or for your own satisfaction?”

“Maybe both. Maybe neither of these.”

“Again, I expected no less from you.”

“I'm not sure if this is supposed to be an insult or a compliment.” Goro let out a laugh at Ren's reply, but the other man just tugged at his hair. He knew that gesture already, it meant that he was flustered.

“A compliment, of course,” he muttered. “I consider myself to be very lucky to be friends with you. It's never a boring day when you're here.”

It would be a miracle if Goro didn't blush after hearing something like this, but he did his best to ignore that fact. 

“Judging from the opinions of the general public, people mostly consider Joker way more entertaining than me.”

“They don't know what they're missing out on,” Ren said softly, and… reached out to touch one of Goro's hands, resting on the counter. Not to hold it, just trace his fingers over the leather of his glove, but… 

He was definitely flirting with him, right? Goro never had much of a love life, but he couldn't be wrong when Ren continued to do things like this. There was no way-- 

They both pulled their hands away the moment the doorbell rang and a blonde girl stormed inside. 

“Ren, you won't guess what Ryuji did this-” She stopped abruptly the moment she noticed Goro. “Ah, I'm sorry, I thought nobody would be here at this hour! I didn't realize you still had customers…”

“It's fine.” Ren flashed him an apologetic smile. “He's a friend.”

“A friend…” The blonde girl have him a curious look, and after a moment her face lit up. “You must be Akechi-kun then!”

“How did you know?” He asked, surprised.

“Ren talks about you!” She replied cheerfully. “Maybe not a lot, since he doesn't talk a lot in general, but it's nice to finally meet the guy he described as terrifyingly smart, interesting and unfairly handsome. I can already tell that the last part is true.”

_ What. _

“You didn't have to tell him that,” Ren protested quietly, and he was definitely blushing, even if only slightly.

The girl only laughed, before turning to him again.

“Sorry, I haven't even introduced myself and I'm already embarrassing Ren. I'm-”

“Let me guess,” Goro interrupted her, looking at her for a longer moment. She was definitely beautiful, in the foreign kind of beauty, and he was pretty sure he'd seen her somewhere before. “Ann Takamaki, am I correct?”

“Totally right! Did Ren mention me?”

“He did, a few times. He seems quite fond of talking about his friends. Besides… You’re famous.”

“Famous?” Ann’s eyes widened at that word.

“You’re a model, right? It would be difficult to remain unaware of your existence, Takamaki-san.”

“Oh, that…” It almost looked as if she let out a relieved sigh. “Sometimes I forget that I’m actually quite popular, hahah…”

...

“Speaking of friends, you mentioned Ryuji. Did something happen?” Ren attempted to change the topic slightly. 

“This… depends.” Ann frowned a little. “On now fine are you with me embarrassing us all in front of Akechi-kun.”

“Yhm… fine enough?” 

“It’s alright, I was supposed to be leaving soon anyway. I’ll leave you and Takamaki-san alone to discuss his,” Goro said, a little disappointed that the evening ended like this, but what he heard from Ann was worth it. 

“Are you sure, Akechi-kun? I didn’t want to make you leave.” Ann’s voice sounded apologetic, so he did his best to smile at her before standing up and gathering his things.

“It’s really alright. I’m quite tired, the case I’m working on is really giving me a hard time.”

“I hope you rest well,” Ren said. “‘Next time, if you tell me in advance that you’re coming, I’ll make dinner.” 

“I’ll text you beforehand then. See you soon.” Goro gave him a smile before turning to the door. 

He could swear that he heard Ann giggle while she watched them.

*** 

He barely managed to deal with last target of the mysterious thieves before another calling was sent out. 

By ‘dealing’ he meant collecting the evidence and arresting them, of course. It wasn’t easy, and far less enjoyable than chasing after Joker. These cosplaying fools were very often targeting people of authority, who’d do anything to avoid facing consequences for their crimes. It was Goro’s duty to make sure they did, especially after someone personally entrusted him with that mission. 

He wasn’t sure why he was lending a hand to some petty criminals, but… just like Ren had said, he had his own vision of what was right, and it was usually obvious who the criminals in more urgent need of putting in jail were.

The new calling card was sent to the owner of one of the most popular newspaper in the whole country. The date of the heist was not revealed, of course, they weren’t  _ that _ reckless, but they had the location. 

And yet, he was outsmarted again. Even though he was in the same building as them, the only things he got out of it were a glimpse of a blue wig styled into twin tails and another black and red card, this time not even left for him to find, but dropped right in front of him while he was chasing after these clowns. 

When watching the recordings from the surveillance cameras the next day, his first instinct was to punch something upon seeing the person wearing the mentioned wig wave at whoever would watch it later. 

Hatsune Miku, that was the name of the character he dressed up as this time. Even Goro knew as much. 

When he was ranting about it to Ren next time he visited Leblanc, the black-haired man had to support himself on the counter, that's how hard he was laughing. 

“So… you were tricked by a guy dressed as Miku,” he finally concluded, then covered his mouth with his hand.

“Stop laughing!”

“Your anger is funnier than Joker wearing a skirt, sorry,” he muttered from behind his fingers.

“You don't sound sorry,” Goro groaned, hiding his face in his hands. “This is pathetic.”

“It's not your fault. You said it yourself, they had an IT specialist with them.”

“They had to! How else would they manipulate the electronic locks and cameras however they wanted in the whole building? And it's not the first time,” he continued complaining. “My bet was always that it’s a group of relatively young people, maybe even teenagers, but this is the thing that makes me wonder…” 

“Hey, don’t underestimate teenagers. You used to be one, too, and from what I know, a pretty brilliant one.” Ren grinned at him. 

“Please, don’t remind me. This is exactly how I ended up here. Dealing with some phantom thief, who’s even mocking me and waving at the camera…”

“Maybe he just wanted to say hello,” Ren hummed. “He clearly likes you, in one way or another.”

Goro would've preferred someone else to like him, not the criminal he swore to catch. Someone else, like Ren himself.

...

“This doesn't really make me happy. And now I just have more work to take care of, since this newspaper publisher is clearly guilty too,” he sighed. “On the other hand though… All these cases I solved in the meantime, thanks to the involvement of these Phantom Thieves, are piling up… and it definitely helps my image, despite me being unable to catch them. I’m not even sure if I should be angry or grateful.”

“You say this, but… aren’t you secretly grateful for something completely different?” Ren asked, tilting his head like a curious animal. 

“Huh? I’m afraid I’m not sure what are you talking about…”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I was under the impression that you’ve been enjoying watching all those villains in disguise get what was coming for them,” he explained. “And by disguise, I don’t mean a Miku cosplay.”

Goro groaned again. If it weren’t for the last part, he would’ve agreed. 

“Leave Miku out of this.” 

“Hey, do you think I’d pull off a Miku cosplay? Maybe I should try.”

“Never. You lack the charisma to do this,” he muttered, trying hard not to imagine Ren in a skirt. He was failing terribly, judging from how hot his face felt. 

“You’d be surprised how confident I can be when I set my mind on something.” Ren smirked, his tone changing slightly. “I could show you sometime.”

_ He’s trying to kill me. _

“By wearing a Miku cosplay?” Goro blurted out, his face becoming even hotter from embarrassment.

“If that’s what you want…” He rested his elbows on the counter and leaned closer, so close that he could nearly whisper into his ear. “But I think there are better ways of doing so, don’t you think?”

Yes, he definitely agreed. He’d probably agree to anything Ren suggested, if only Ren’s phone didn’t start ringing the next moment. For a second the black-haired man looked genuinely disappointed, before apologizing and answering it. 

“Yeah, Sojiro? Wait… what? Futaba did what? I really hope Morgana is safe,” Ren talked, his expression slowly turning from confused to concerned. “I… don’t know how I feel about this. Fine, I’ll stop by after I lock the shop up.” 

He smiled apologetically at Goro after hanging up. 

“Sorry, it was my dad. Apparently Futaba accidentally set something in her room on fire, and Morgana… that is, my cat, was staying with her today…”

_ There’s a lot to unpack here.  _ Goro didn't even know what to start with, but… there was one thing that attracted his attention. 

“You call your father by his name…?” He asked hesitantly, and the lost look that appeared on Ren's face instantly made him regret it.

“Ah, that…” He scratched his neck sheepishly. “We're… not really blood related. I was only adopted by Sojiro a few years ago… it was kind of a complicated situation.”

“Oh… I apologise, I didn't mean to pry…”

“It's okay, I don't really mind telling you about it.” Ren smiled reassuringly. “It's not a very interesting story though.”

“Even if it's not, if you're fine with it… please, tell me. I want to know more about you,” Goro said, and received a nod in answer. Ren looked around for a moment, then left him spot behind the counter and walked up to the door, flipping the sign before sitting down on the bar stool next to him. 

“Like I said… it was a pretty complicated situation,” he began quietly. “I do have biological parents, you know. I'm Sakura Ren now, but a few years ago my name was Amamiya Ren. It probably sounds weird.”

Seeing how nervous Ren seemed to be, Goro felt a little braver than he usually would and reached for his hand, then squeezed it gently.

“Let me judge that after I hear everything.”

“Right,” he laughed softly, squeezing back before continuing. “So. When I was in high school, I got… arrested and sued on false charges. For assault. After that, I was forced to transfer schools, and ended up in Tokyo on probation. My parents seemed glad to get rid of me, they never cared much… I only got a place to live thanks to Sojiro deciding to let me stay here.”

There was a lot of concerning things about what he just said. Arrest, false charges, probation, having to move here…

“I was supposed to stay here only for a year, but I became attached to both Sojiro and Futaba… and I also found friends here. I didn't want to go back, and… well, my parents didn't exactly want me back either. But Sojiro and Futaba did. They were treating me like a family member, so… it somehow ended up with him getting custody of me. And I stayed here for good, as Sakura Ren.”

Goro didn't really know what to say. He didn't expect the always so kind Ren to have a history like this, but at the same time he didn't have trouble believing in his story. He knew the best how easily a kid's life could turn into hell because of some irresponsible adults.

“I'm… I'm glad you've found the place you belong to. Even if life wasn't fair to you,” he said. They were sitting close enough for their shoulders to touch if only they shifted a little closer, and that's what they did. 

“Sometimes some bad things lead to good things, and you just have to wait a little. Right now, I'm happy,” Ren replied, gently freeing his hand from Goro's hold, only to intertwine their fingers together. This definitely didn't feel like a platonic gesture, but… it wasn't the right moment to bring it up. The fact that Ren trusted him enough to talk about something like this with him, and Goro's desire to comfort him, were both more important.

Suddenly he felt like the two of them had more in common than he initially thought, and he wasn't sure if it was anything to be happy about, but… at the same time, he wished to be closer to him even more than before. For a moment they sat there in comfortable silence, until… 

“So, what about that Miku cosplay? Should I get one?”

“I’m going to personally arrest if you make me look at this.”

“If it’s you arresting me, then I won’t resist, detective.” Ren laughed, leaning even closer and rubbing his cheek against Goro’s shoulder like a rather big, very affectionate cat. 

Goro’s mind went blank for a blissful moment, before the realization that Ren could probably hear how loud his heart was beating dawned on him. And yet… even after that, somehow, he didn’t panic. Actually, Ren’s touch, him holding his hand tightly… It all had the opposite effect. It was strangely calming, and… Goro could feel Ren’s trust in him. He joked about arresting Ren, of course, but his reply… For someone who already had bad experiences with the police, it felt like a strangely trusting answer. 

Goro didn’t really trust himself with not letting down someone who trusted him this much, but… he also felt happy. Happy that there was someone who would even consider that.

“I think… I think that arrest won't be necessary after all,” he muttered, earning another quiet laugh. 

“I’m glad. I probably wouldn’t be able to see you so often if I got arrested,” Ren said, so softly that Goro barely heard him. 

It was almost too much for him to handle all at once, but Ren didn’t push it any further. It seemed like he himself also wasn’t too sure what he was doing, and they ended up just sitting close, holding hands and chatting far too late into the night than it was acceptable for two adults with jobs.

From ranting about some thief in a skirt to holding hands with his crush… this evening truly took a turn, but he couldn't complain. 

It was the nicest evening he had in a while.

***

The next calling card came shortly after Goro was done dealing with the aftermath of the previous heist of the troublemaker thieves. As if they could somehow tell when his schedule became more free. 

It wasn't any different that the previous times, but this time Goro was determined to finally put an end to this chase. He managed to convince the CEO that received a calling card to tighten the security in the office building, and he himself was always ready to rush into action whenever it would be needed.

But just like Ren said, no matter how old those thieves were, he shouldn't have underestimated them, ever. 

“What do you mean, they disappeared?!” He snapped at one of the security guards. “Did you let them escape again?!”

“No, I don't think they left the building yet,” the poor guy said. “It would be impossible for them to escape unnoticed, but… when the connection with the security cameras came back, they were nowhere to be found!”

Goro thought about it for a moment. It was obviously a trap, they did something on purpose, to make them believe that they really escaped while they were still inside the building. But how could this be possible, if they vanished from the view of the cameras…? And it's not like it was the first time they pulled off something similar…

Goro's eyes shifted to the exit of the ventilation shaft, and suddenly he felt like an even bigger fool. 

Of course there's no cameras inside of there, and it was big enough for a slim person to fit inside. Even if they were wearing a Naruto cosplay.

“How many of these can you find in the whole building?” He asked, clearly surprising the guard.

“Huh? I'm not sure, I'd have to check.”

“Then please, do it quickly,” he said, aware that his voice sounded more than just a little threatening.

“Yes, sir…”

He spent the next few minutes ordering the other police officers present in the building to check all the entrances to the ventilation shafts, then proceeding to take one of those spots for himself. 

At this point, he was grabbing every chance he spotted, and, to his surprise, this time… 

It paid off. 

Just when he arrived at his destination, someone who clearly didn't expect him there pushed out the vent and crawled out of the shaft, landing on the floor not too far from Goro. His movements were surprisingly quiet and graceful, and for a moment Goro could only stare at the… dressed as some Naruto character person. 

Said person was alone. Whatever happened to the rest of the team, Goro didn’t know, but they probably split up… maybe this one was supposed to play the decoy. But if they decided on something like this, then they must’ve known of an escape route Goro didn’t. He wasn’t going to underestimate them anymore, they were smart enough to give them the credit for it. 

_ But would they really leave one of them behind?  _ He wondered, watching the lone silhouette and realizing something. 

This was the closest he’d ever gotten to anyone from the band of thieves. He’d never been so close before. Just a few steps, and… 

He must’ve made some noise, because suddenly the thief was on guard, and he himself raised the gun he was holding this entire time. Their eyes met for a moment, and… 

For that one second, he felt some familiarity here. He didn’t know why, but it was thrilling, to be able to face him like this. 

“So?” He raised one eyebrow, scanning the man in front of him thoroughly. The mask on his face was preventing him from identifying the thief, but it didn’t matter. He’d unmask him soon. “Who are you supposed to be this time?”

“Uhm,” the thief let out a soft noise. He sounded… slightly distressed. Which was to be expected but it was still a little funny to watch him struggle. “...Kakashi. From accounting class.”

His voice was heavily muffled by the mask, so Goro wasn’t sure if he heard that right. And if he did, it didn’t really make much sense.

“...excuse me?” 

Kakashi from accounting class was beginning to look even more distressed, and didn’t seem to fond of speaking up. Instead, his eyes darted around, as if looking for an escape route.

_ Not wasting time, huh. _

“My advice would be not to do anything reckless, if you don't want me to use force. But doing reckless things is your specialty, right, mister thief?” He said, making the guy freeze. “I suggest you give up and go with me out of your own free will.” 

“I'm sorry, can't do, Akechi-san,” he mumbled through the mask. So he knew his name… Well, obviously at least Joker knew his identity, but this wasn't enough to tell that this… Kakashi cosplayer was Joker for sure. 

“You're not in control of the situation here,” Goro replied firmly.

“Joker,” the guy muttered quietly. “If you're wondering, it's me.”

“Ah. So it really is you. I don't think trying to seduce the detective on your case is working in your favor,” he said, earning a muffled chuckle. He didn’t receive any other response aside from that, but it was only natural. For someone who stayed anonymous for so long, it wouldn’t be wise to reveal anything about him, even the actual sound of his voice.

Something was telling him though that Joker was pretty confident about being able to escape.

“Why are you doing all of this?” He found himself asking, before he could come to the conclusion it’s a bad idea. “What do you get from this? You never steal any material goods anyway. Is serving justice really satisfying enough to you for all this trouble?”

Joker’s response was only a firm nod, and Goro felt stupid. He expected this answer. Of course, there was still a chance this group actually had some ulterior motives they hadn’t revealed yet, but there was nothing that would point at that. 

And if so… did Goro really have the willpower to arrest the man in front of him? Did he care enough? He knew well that all he really wanted to do was catch him, for his own self satisfaction. To prove he was capable of doing so. As for arresting… 

It seemed like Joker sensed his hesitation and decided to take advantage of it. 

And this guy was  _ fast. _

Before he could even react, Joker reached into the pocket of his costume and dropped something onto the ground. The next moment smoke filled the corridor, forcing Goro to cover his face with his arm to protect himself. 

_ A smoke screen? Where did he even get something like this? _

It most likely wasn’t poisonous in any way, considering Joker was breathing the same air as him, but it heavily limited Goro’s vision. He obviously couldn’t aim his gun like this, and not even chase Joker, as he was moving so quietly that there was no way of telling in which direction he went.

He wasn’t even sure if the quiet “I’m sorry” he heard wasn’t just a creation of his imagination. When the smoke was gone, a red and black card was lying on the ground, addressed to him once again, and signed with “yours, Joker” and a little heart drawing. 

Although he tried to look for him and contacted the security, he was nowhere to be found. A little later it became obvious that the rest of Joker's group had escaped as well.

But for some reason, Goro wasn't even too mad about it.

***

“... and that's how it went this time,” Goro concluded his story, raising the cup of coffee to his lips while watching Ren's reaction. 

Ren, who simply covered his mouth with his hand and tried his best to hide his laughter, but failed terribly. Even if he didn't laugh out loud, Goro knew this quiet man well enough to tell he was amused by the way his eyes sparkled.

“What is so funny to you? That I failed again?” He asked, and Ren, having to reply, removed his hand, letting a muffled laughter escape him. 

“No, it's just… it seems that this guy panicked, threw a meme at you and ran away, and you didn't even realize it.”

“...a meme?”

“You know. Kakashi from accounting class. It's a pretty old meme. Give me a second.” Ren reached for his phone and a moment later he turned it around to show something to Goro. 

It looked like a screenshot of some post, with the text in it written in English. It wasn't even funny.

“... who the hell uses an outdated meme in this kind of situation!?” He snapped when Ren's laughter became louder, probably because of his expression. “What kind of criminal does it!? Stop laughing!”

“Sorry, sorry. You're just so charming when you're angry,” he replied, definitely noticing how Goro's cheeks instantly turned red. 

“Stop joking around…” 

“I’m being honest, Goro. I wouldn’t lie to my favourite regular about something like this.” Ren smiled at him, a smile so genuine that it was impossible to doubt him. What only embarrassed Goro further, obviously. “I’ll have to thank that Joker guy somehow, for turning the neat detective prince so expressive. I’m a bit jealous though.” 

“...jealous?”

“I wish it I could’ve been the reason for that, not him.”

_ If only you knew how many emotions you’re making me feel,  _ Goro thought, trying so, so hard to make them stay inside. 

“Oh, so you wish for me to be angry at you more often? You’ll have to try harder then, I don’t have any particular reason for it yet,” he said.

“Well, we could skip the angry part,” Ren replied. “And I’m… pretty sure you aren’t actually angry at Joker.” 

“What makes you think that?” 

“I…” The black-haired man fell silent for a moment, thinking about an answer. “I’ve seen your real anger, Goro. When someone doesn’t respect your work, when someone underestimates you, when someone treats you like a child due to your age… That’s when you’re really angry. Right now… you seem a little frustrated, but at the same time… excited.”

“That’s…” Now it was Goro’s time to look for the right words. First of all, Ren’s observation skills were impressive. Second, he not only listened to his rants, but also remembered those details and drew conclusions. 

And also… He was right.

“I have to admit, I… More than anything, meeting Joker face to face was... exciting,” Goro confessed, looking anywhere but at Ren. “I’ve spent so much time chasing him around that there was something thrilling about being so close to catching him, even if he turned out to be ridiculous.” 

“Ridiculous? In what way?” Ren asked. Goro caught a glimpse of him frowning when he looked at him again. 

“That silly costume and meme aside… of course I didn’t get to talk to him for longer than a minute, but whoever he is, I don’t think I can hate him,” he muttered, feeling kind of awkward. “I accept him as my rival, and I still intend on catching him, of course, but I don’t think I can call him a villain when nothing of what he did had any negative consequences. I… might actually believe what you said about him. That in one way or another, he genuinely likes me. Though… I’m not actually sure how I feel about this.”

“Now I’m definitely jealous,” Ren hummed. “He sounds more interesting than me. How can I even compete against him?”

Goro’s brain was suggesting him two things to do now: either leaving or laughing that line off. Both of these were extremely childish things to do, especially when the person he had feelings for was definitely flirting with him, so he did neither of them.

“I… don’t think you have anything to worry about,” he muttered, giving Ren a hesitant look and meeting wide, gray eyes staring back at him. A second later Ren’s surprised expression melted into a smile. 

“I feel honored,” he replied, reaching for Goro’s hand and squeezing it gently. “When you have some time, do you want to go somewhere with me? To see a movie, or just do anything else, if movies are not your thing.”

There was no way of interpreting this in any other way than as a date invitation. Ren was asking him out. 

Trying to ignore the uneasiness he felt, and the annoying thought that there’s no way this could actually end well for him, Goro squeezed Ren’s hand back. 

“I would love to.”

*** 

Despite how nervous he was about it, the date was a success. If it really was a date. Neither of them stated it out loud, but with the way their relationship was progressing, it had to be. They went to see a superhero movie of Goro’s choice, and while Ren seemed surprised by his taste, he didn’t comment on it.

After it, they started going out together more often, usually with one of them suggesting a place and even paying for the other. Holding hands was slowly becoming something normal between them. It turned into a warm and comforting gesture, and was no longer making Goro’s heart want to jump out of his chest. But… aside from that, neither of them made any moves. 

Goro hated not having any clarity in this case, but was too scared to take things into his own hands. Relationships were never something he was good at. Actually, he sucked at them.

The second thing consuming his time wasn’t giving him any more clarity either. The cosplaying thieves, finally reaching the status of Phantom Thieves, were still doing their worst. Or best, depending on how you looked at it. So many people were cheering on them at this point that it was hard to decide on whether they were still criminals, or already idols.

Thank god nobody knew their leader was very fond of flirting with the detective on his case.

Goro was about to push the door and enter Leblanc, but one glance through the door’s windows stopped him for a moment. The sight of Ren gently picking up a large black cat from the counter and putting it on the floor wasn’t something he expected, but it was certainly endearing. 

“How many times do I have to tell you you’re not allowed on the counter, Mona? Sojiro would…” Goro heard him say upon opening the door, but the sound of the bell quickly distracted him from the cat. “Ah. Welcome back, Goro.”

“...I assume this little guy is Morgana, am I correct?” 

The cat slipped out of Ren’s hands and approached him instead, rubbing his head against Goro’s leg.

“Yeah… I used to live above this cafe, so he still remembers this place as home and sometimes follows me here. I hope you don’t mind,” Ren replied with a sheepish smile. 

“I’m certainly more of a dog person, but I think we can become friends. Right, Mona?” He kneeled down to pet the cat, and Morgana purred in response. Goro smiled; something about this cat reminded him of his owner.

“Handsome, intelligent and also my cat likes you? I think I’ve found the perfect man,” Ren laughed a little, and Goro’s heart skipped a beat. He felt like a teenager in love.

“Don’t exaggerate things…” He muttered, definitely blushing, but Ren just laughed again, reaching out to him and pushing a lost strand of brown hair behind his ear. 

“I’m definitely not doing it, I'm just saying how I see it,” Ren said way too casually for the words that just left his mouth, then stood up and took his spot behind the counter. “So, what is it today? Futaba messaged me earlier that I should expect something really big this time.”

“Huh? Ah, you mean the latest heist of our local troublemakers… They really put some effort into this hobby of theirs this time,” he replied, accepting the change of topic. “Their target was an idol agency rumored to mistreat their idols… and the evidence they delivered to me is definitely enough to confirm it these weren't just rumors. Actually, it's all pretty disturbing…” 

He trailed off for a moment. Goro had his share of dealing with the media when he was younger, but they eventually left him alone, when he didn't express any willingness to continue being the newest attraction in their zoo after… certain events. They always move on after a while, anyway. When the current topic becomes boring…

This was a different case, though. He wasn't exactly a part of the entertainment industry, so his experiences were much more… tolerable. And at some point he even enjoyed being in the spotlight, even though it was only temporary, empty joy. 

Still, he could sympathize.

“Goro? Are you okay?” Ren leaned forward a bit, invading his personal space and bringing him back to reality. 

“Ah, sorry, I just… sometimes I get lost in thoughts too easily,” he muttered. “Going back to the topic. Futaba-chan told you that this time they went all out, right? Well, they decided to rescue the idols while… dressed as idols themselves. The internet happily informed me that the series they picked is called Love Live, and even told me which character each of them picked.”

“You look particularly amused this time,” Ren pointed out with a smirk.

“Even I can appreciate how they adapted to the situation. In addition, I've seen the security camera feeds,” Goro said. “They all dressed as female idols, which was pretty amusing.”

He pulled out his phone to show Ren the photos that were available to the media as well. 

“Since I've met Joker in person, judging by his body type, this is him.” Goro pointed at the man with black pigtails and a surgical mask. From what Goro had gathered, the character he picked wasn't the leader, but she certainly fit his image.

“Hmm, I don't know this anime, but he really pulls off this outfit,” Ren commented, and Goro replied with a groan. “What? He has nice legs, you can't deny it-”

“When you put it like this, I really can't.”

“So you admit that he's attractive.” Ren grinned, as if it meant some victory to him.

…

“How could I? I can't even see his face,” Goro hummed, thinking about how there's no way that Joker was more attractive then the man in front of him. But he couldn't say it out loud.

“Well, that's true. I guess I don't have to be jealous after all.”

“I guarantee you, you don't,” he said quietly, wondering whether Ren wasn't just giving him more time, because he understood that he needed it. “I mean it. Really.”

“I'm glad. Because for me…” Ren fell silent after this, his hand going up to his hair to fiddle with the ends.  _ Oh.  _ Whatever he was about to say, it was going to be embarrassing. 

But Goro wanted to know. Because whatever it was, it concerned him, and it most likely aligned with his own interests… No, it sounded too strange, too formal in this situation.

Whatever Ren wanted to say, it'd most likely confirm if his feelings were returned.

“... because for you?” He prompted. They both seemed nervous, but in the best possible way. 

Hesitantly, he took off his gloves and dropped them on the counter. Ren, of course, took the hint, reaching for his hands and intertwining their fingers together. 

“You know, I might try to flirt with you whenever I can, but I don't really have much experience with that kinda stuff,” he said quietly. “I'm genuinely terrified I'll mess something up.”

“What a coincidence. Me too,” Goro replied, tightening his hold.

“Really? I'd have thought that the detective prince would take advantage of his popularity,” Ren joked, but quickly became serious again, seeing Goro's expression.

“It…. It wasn't the real me. Nobody… would've wanted the real me,” he muttered. “I'm done with that.”

Ren freed one of his hands to bring it to Goro's face and gently brush his bangs away.

“So, is the Goro I know the real one?”

He closed his eyes, taking in the warmth of Ren’s touch. 

“...as real as he can be, I think.” 

“I'm glad. No, I'm… I'm happy,” Ren corrected himself, and it sounded like he meant it. “I don't want you to feel like you need to pretend when with me. Actually, the more of your temper I see, the more I like you.”

“You think you're so smooth…” Goro muttered, not really knowing how else he could respond to this when internally he was panicking. 

“No, not really. I'm not as brave as you think, but… if I want you to know it, I have to say it, right?” 

He didn't expect this evening to go this way, but apparently Ren liked surprising him. 

Even more than that, he didn't expect the gentle kiss Ren placed against his forehead. His eyes snapped open, but his mind went blank once again, and he could only stare at Ren wordlessly.

“You don't have to say anything. I understand.”

Of course he did. Of course.

When Ren walked around the counter to sit down next to him and pull into an embrace, he welcomed it, a simple thought hitting him harder than he expected. 

_ I love him. _

***

Trying to catch the Phantom Thieves was becoming more and more bizarre, with the overwhelming support the public was showing to them. 

Surprisingly, his own career was doing great as well. Maybe he couldn't catch them just yet, but ‘cleaning up’ after them and arresting their targets after confirming their guilt apparently looked good both in the eyes of his boss and the fans the Phantom Thieves gained.

Everything would be fine if Joker wasn't obviously taunting him. He was clearly daring Goro to catch him, and one of the things he hated the most was losing. 

And so, their little game continued. 

No matter how long Goro thought about it, those thieves had to be pretty brave to target places with security so tight, especially after announcing where they’d attack beforehand. They wouldn’t be called the Phantom Thieves if they couldn’t pull it off though. Their new heist, targeting an art gallery, was just as well planned… 

...but apparently Joker was ready to take some risk. Earlier, on the cameras, Goro managed to observe the whole squad and see that their theme this time was superheroes, but the person who lead them wasn’t a guy. It was definitely a girl, dressed as Black Widow, followed by Captain Marvel, Captain America, a surprisingly tiny Iron Man and a few others. He couldn’t identify any of them as Joker. 

At least until he spotted him while searching the building himself. 

It was a very different encounter than the previous time. For someone who was hiding from an entire building of police officers, Joker seemed strangely calm, even though he previously panicked when meeting him face to face. This time, he only brought a finger to his lips, and gestured at Goro to follow him with the other hand before running off towards the stairs leading to the roof. 

What else could he do, other than go after him? 

He had so many questions. Why did he get separated from his team? Why would he lure Goro to the rooftop, cutting off his own escape route? What did he want from him in the first place? 

Instead of asking any of these, he blurted out something completely different. 

“Thor? Thought you’d be more handsome in person.” 

The laughter that came from Joker was muffled, barely audible, but definitely visible, the fake beard attached to his face trembling a little. He didn’t respond, but judging from his reaction he understood the reference. 

Great, he just outed himself as a superhero movies fan in front of his arch rival.

Joker walked over to the edge of the rooftop, and only now Goro noticed he was holding something. That ‘something’ was most likely the painting they stole, but… earlier he saw the blonde girl dressed as Captain Marvel hold it. When did they even have the time to meet up and switch the person holding onto it…?

“If you think I’ll just let you escape, again, you’re wro-” Goro started, taking a few steps in his direction, but Joker surprised him, turning around and pushing the painting into his arms. 

“Take it,” he whispered. “Check it. It was plagiarised.”

“Wha-” 

Not even letting him finish, Joker turned away from him, towards the edge again. 

What was the purpose of all of this? Why would he give it back? This way, only Goro would get praised for retrieving the stolen piece of art, and whatever they’d tell the public, it’d just make it look like a failure of the Phantom Thieves. Even if it indeed turned out to be a counterfeit, and he found some dirt on the artist-

“Wait!” 

Joker stopped, looking at him over his shoulder.

“What do you gain from handing your successes over to me? Your anonymity makes me the only person who can actually see these cases through to the end! What do you get-”

They were still close enough for Joker to close the distance between them in a few steps. Goro should probably be more cautious, not let him get so close, but… the other man gently pried one of his hands away from the painting he was holding and brought it to his lips. 

“Satisfaction.”

Goro was so shocked that he didn't even try to stop him anymore when he ran over to the edge again, picking up something that seemed like a rope prepared beforehand. A moment later he was gone, and when Goro tried to look down, he only noticed an opened window a floor below them. 

This one was on him. He couldn't even pretend Joker didn't escape because he didn't bother to try to stop him.

***

“A Spider-Man reference? Really?” Ren raised one eyebrow, looking at him from the other side of the booth. Leblanc was long since closed, and Goro ended up staying there way too long again, after Ren offered to make him dinner. He couldn't possibly refuse, of course. 

“Sometimes I say something without thinking much, just for the sake of saying something,” Goro replied. It was a miracle that he wasn't too embarrassed to admit to having done that. 

“That's true,” Ren hummed with a nod. “Though I only remember it happening just after we met for the first time.”

“I beg you, don't remind me.”

“I thought it was endearing. I still have no idea who Hegel was.”

“Liar. You definitely looked him up later to laugh at me with Futaba-chan.”

“Okay, you got me here. But I wasn't laughing at you. Like I said, I found it endearing. Saying nonsense when you get nervous? Cute as hell,” Ren continued. “Joker was probably happy to get a reaction like that out of you.”

“How can you know that?”

“Ah, I can't, of course. But at least part of the reason why he's doing things this was… must be to entertain, right?” Ren mused. He sounded pretty confident about it.

“Maybe you should've been the one to become a detective, not me. You seem to understand the way he thinks quite well.”

“With my criminal record? No way.” He laughed while saying this, but… “Besides, I wouldn't have any motivation to catch him.”

“Ah, so you're suggesting you're actually a fan of the Phantom Thieves?” Goro asked playfully. “Even considering the relationship you have with the detective on their case?”

“I think they’re doing the right thing, but am I a fan? No, not really,” Ren said. “You’re the one I’m cheering on, but seeing how much fun you’re having with it… Sometimes I think it might be better if this chase goes on for a little longer.”

Goro looked at their hands, fingers twined together over the table. Ren… cared about him way more than he was letting on. But more than about his achievements, he cared about Goro’s happiness. Joker, on the other hand, seemed to be doing a lot to help his career. And he couldn’t lie about this to himself, both meeting Ren and being assigned to this case were probably the best things that happened to him… in years. 

But… 

…

“I think many people agree with you. The Phantom Thieves even have their own website,” he finally said. “I tried investigating it as well, but all I could find was that its owner was just another fan, and it’s more of a fanpage than anything. It’s very popular though, and people even leave their own suggestions about whom they should target next.”

“Ah, I’ve seen it. But the website’s design leaves a lot to be desired,” Ren pointed out. 

“That’s true, but don’t you think it might be because their group lacks their own brand?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Dressing up as well known characters who definitely are heroes to some people seems like an amazing idea, but it’s not enough to make their own heroes out of them. They keep to fiction and lack individuality… Wouldn’t it be more interesting if they became the heroes of our times, instead of being just imitations?” Goro wondered. “But that’s just a thought. Don’t tell anyone that a detective told you this.”

“It sounds almost like you’re their fan yourself.” 

“Maybe I am? I’m not saying this as officer Akechi, but simply as Goro,” he said, smiling at Ren. “Someone who sometimes wishes heroes were real.”

Ren, who wasn’t even looking at him for a while, squeezed his hand a little. 

“...me too,” he muttered. “Sometimes I wish a website like this existed when I was in high school, so I could just put a name there, and…”

He paused. Earlier he only talked about how he ended up here, in Tokyo, with a new family, but… didn’t elaborate on his circumstances. Goro couldn’t imagine something like that would be easy to talk about… He himself would never forgive someone who messed with his life like that. He was the type to hold grudges and spend who knows how long planning on getting back at people who had wronged him. 

“Actually, no.” Ren sighed. “Back then, it all happened so fast, and I… I was scared, I guess.  I didn’t even remember the name, it was someone who could easily make sure I wouldn’t learn it. A website wouldn’t have helped me with anything.” 

“I’m… I’m sorry you had to go through this. The police can be really useless sometimes, don’t they…” Goro said, looking away from Ren too. He worked with the police since he was sixteen, he knew what things looked like. He could easily imagine Ren as a terrified teenager, failed by the system. “I’m surprised you could even convince yourself to treat me nicely, knowing who I am…”

“You’re different,” Ren replied quickly. “You’re… special.” 

“What could’ve made me so special back when we first met, and you didn’t even know me? For all you knew, I was just a random detective.” He sounded way too bitter about this. More than he’d like to. 

“Uhm.” Ren scratched his neck awkwardly with his free hand. “I don’t want you to think it’s the only reason why I came to like you, because it’s not. At first all I felt for you was respect, but then… I… It…”

“Calm down, Ren. It’s okay, I know.” Goro leaned closer, reaching out to touch his face. Their eyes met again, and Goro could feel Ren relax. “Everything’s alright. Just tell me.” 

“...I think it’ll be enough if I tell you the name of the guy who ruined my high school career. I learned it later,” he muttered. “It’s… Masayoshi Shido.” 

For a moment, Goro froze. A second later, he felt some of his old anger coming back to him, even though he thought it was gone. But of course if wouldn’t ever go away for good, no matter what. 

Learning that another person he loved was hurt by the same man wasn’t what he expected though. He wished… He wished he could go back in time and arrest him once again, adding another crime to the long list he gathered back then. 

“You understand now, right? Even if you didn’t do it for me… You already did the thing I could ask the Phantom Thieves to do.” Ren tried to smile, but it looked shaky. “In a way, you were a hero to the high school me.” 

“I’m no hero,” Goro replied . “There was nothing heroic about that. I just… Ren, you definitely know that, everyone does, Shido is my biological father. All I did back then was for myself, to get back at him. Even if I solved other cases while aiming to finally catch that bastard, it was all…”

“It’s fine. A hero is still a hero, even if the good he does was for selfish reasons. At least that’s what I think. I don’t think it’s all you are though.” 

“But-”

“Goro, I’ve spent enough time with you to know you’re not some selfish asshole,” Ren said firmly. “And I didn’t fall in love with a hero, but with the person you really are.”

…

“I’m sorry for throwing it at you like this-”

“Ren, be quiet for a moment.”

…

....

It was a love confession. 

Goro didn’t hear anyone say they loved him in years. His mind didn’t quite know how to process it. All of it felt so foreign to him, and suddenly the table was in the way, and not being able to hold Ren over it was too annoying, and nothing else mattered, aside from how much he wanted to tell him he loved him too, but forming a sentence had never been harder. 

“Please, say it again,” Goro whispered. “Please.” 

Ren laughed, like always understanding him too well, as if he didn’t spend years learning how to keep his emotions under control. Not letting go of Goro’s hand, he stood up, walked around the table and made him move closer to the wall, so they both would sit on the same side. Then, he pulled the surprised man closer, sliding his free arm around Goro’s waist, bringing them so close their foreheads touched. 

“I love you. I’ve been in love with you for quite a while,” Ren said quietly. “Though this wasn’t really the most romantic confession…” 

“It’s fine like this,” he blurted out, instantly feeling himself blush. If any of them wasn’t romantic enough, it would be Goro. “I mean… I…”

“Cute.” Ren smirked, now letting go of his hand and bringing to his cheek instead. “Can I kiss you?” 

All Goro managed to do was nod and close his eyes before their lips met in a gentle, gentle kiss, so sweet and innocent that there could be no better first kiss, no matter how hard he’d think about it. 

But there was no need for thinking right now. Not when he had Ren exactly where he wanted him, his own hands wandering… 

“It’s getting late,” Ren muttered, his lips traveling to Goro’s cheek. “I live nearby. Want to stay over?” 

Another nod. He could swear he was better with words than this at some point… Maybe he should relearn that skill. He couldn’t just keep on expecting Ren to know how he felt. 

He wanted to tell him he loved him, too. 

*** 

The next heist of the Phantom Thieves was a disaster. 

From the moment the calling card was sent Goro knew it wasn’t going to be an easy one. The target wasn’t someone who’d accept the police’s protection, unless they could be easily bribed. This of course didn’t apply to him, who’d happily take down the mafia boss if he had enough evidence against him. 

Well, if a calling card was involved, it most likely meant that the Phantom Thieves were either about to obtain the evidence, or already had it, and that soon it could be in Goro’s hands instead. Hoping for too much in this case could be dangerous though, both for them and for him. The location mentioned in the calling card was a club in a rather shady neighborhood, suspected to be the mafia boss’ hideout… and best idea Goro could come up with was going in undercover and somehow sneaking into the back rooms. Having backup outside of the building, he should be fine…

Or so he thought. Apparently that place’s own ‘security’ was tighter than he expected, and while his experience with dealing with the Phantom Thieves helped him find them, it didn’t help him with stopping them from getting separated the moment they were ambushed. 

Still hiding, he chose to follow Joker and the men chasing after him. From what he observed over the course of months, the thieves weren’t actually armed, but the mafia definitely were. If the situation called of it, he’d have to intervene. 

As a side note, he couldn’t recall their new costumes from anywhere. Nothing was coming to his mind. 

“Damn it, where did this brat go?!” 

“Why are you asking me?! You were here too!” 

“This building isn’t that big, how the hell are we not even able to catch a bunch of kids?!” 

Goro’s answer would be their lack of brain power, but he didn’t feel like discussing it with them, as he took a turn right, choosing to go downstairs, which they didn’t even consider. Their perceptiveness was truly baffling. 

Upon reaching the lower floor, he stopped around the nearby corner and listened, trying to make sure they didn’t realize he was there. It didn’t seem so, but… he only turned around on the last possible moment before someone attempted to grab his arm. 

“Shhh!” Joker brought his finger to his lips before Goro could even say anything. It seemed like this time he was back to being stressed, but it’s not like it was hard to understand why. Goro nodded… for some reason letting the thief, this time wearing a white mask, lead him somewhere while holding his wrist. 

He only stopped when they were far enough from their initial location. 

“I suppose not everything went according to plan this time,” Goro said, watching him carefully. Joker nodded.

“Are your friends going to be okay?” 

“Why are you asking?” He whispered, making the detective smile. 

“Because I’m not really here to arrest you. My target today is the owner of this place, so why not cooperate?” 

Joker stared at him in disbelief, gray eyes visible from behind the mask. 

“Ah, but I haven’t given up on catching you, not yet. So, if you allow-” Goro reached out, trying to grab at Joker’s mask, but a gloved hand grabbed his own before he could do so. “Figures. Going back to the topic though…” 

“I heard something from here!” An unknown voice interrupted them, and Joker didn’t seem to like the idea of finding out who it belonged to. Still holding Goro’s hand, he pulled him down the corridor away from the voice, but it seemed like its owner wasn’t alone. 

The problem was that the footsteps they heard were coming from the direction they were going in. Joker stopped again and let out a sigh, frantically looking around. Letting go of Goro, he walked up to the vent and after examining it for a moment, he grabbed at it and simply pulled it off. 

_ Either he’s stronger than he looks, or this building is falling apart on its own.  _

“You first.”

“Huh?” Goro blinked in surprise.

“They can’t follow us there. Body type, you know.” 

Right. Both Joker and him were relatively slim, but those ‘guards’ weren’t. This way…

“Hurry up, we can’t afford you getting lost in thoughts right now,” Joker urged him. 

He could leave him. He didn’t have to wait. 

“Sorry,” Goro mumbled before beginning to crawl inside the shaft. 

It seemed like he was taking too long though. 

“He’s here! There’s also some other brat with him!” He heard a voice, and at the same moment Joker forcefully pushed him inside. 

The next thing he heard was a gunshot and a pained gasp. 

“Joker?!” 

“I’m fine, just go! I’m right behind you!” 

Goro of course did his best to move faster, but even though he usually had no problems with staying calm in dangerous situations, he was beginning to panic. He only calmed down a little when he made sure Joker really followed him, and that they were out of reach of the people chasing them. 

He wasn’t sure where they ended up, but the moment they had to leave it became obvious that his companion wasn’t completely fine, like he claimed to be. Goro had to help help him crawl out of the shaft, careful not to touch his right arm… which was definitely bleeding. 

“What the hell were you thinking?!” He asked in an angry whisper. “You should’ve gone first without-” 

“Didn’t want you to get hurt,” Joker interrupted him, mumbling through clenched teeth. 

“So you decided it was better if you got shot instead of me?!”

“So what?!” The thief hissed like an angry cat. “It’s just a scrape. I’ll be fine.”

“You’re bleeding-”

“This isn’t enough to kill me. Let’s just get out of here. I know the way.” 

“We should at least take care of th-” 

“We don’t have the time for this!” 

Hearing the desperation in his voice, Goro finally gave up and helped him stand up from the floor. He wished he could do more to help him, but not even a few minutes later they reached some back door leading outside, and Joker wordlessly pulled out a lockpick out of his coat and threw it to him. 

_ It would be difficult to do it with just one hand, of course… _

It took him a moment to open the door, but when he could finally breathe in the cold night air, he felt more relieved than he’d like to be. 

“Joker!” Just after they left, an orange-haired girl appeared in their field of vision. She was wearing a mask as well, but… “Oh my god, you’re fine, I’m so glad…” 

“I suggest taking him to the hospital,” Goro said, attracting her attention. 

“W-What?” 

“Don’t listen to him, Navi.”

“R-Right, right… Wait, aren’t you a cop!?” She pointed at Goro. “We have to get out of here, Joker!” 

“I’m letting you go, so please, don’t be so loud,” he groaned. “Just go.” 

“Wait.” This time a male silhouette appeared behind Navi. Whoever it was, he threw something at Goro. 

A folder. 

“Take it. It’s what we managed to find. I’m not sure how useful it will be, but if that’s what Joker would want. Right?” 

Joker nodded, and when the unknown masked man approached him, he accepted his help without complaining. 

“See you again some other time, detective,” he said as a goodbye, a hint of smile in his voice. 

He couldn’t have known that in Goro’s mind everything had fallen into place at that very moment.

“See you again… soon.”

*** 

“So, this time their heist didn’t work out? I see…” Ren muttered, looking for the right coffee beans to prepare the drink Goro requested. “Seems like even heroes disappoint sometimes.”

“To be honest, I can’t say I’m disappointed. It makes them seem more like actual people, not… very ridiculous ghosts,” he replied. “Besides… Joker protected me, so can I really complain?”

“What else could he do? If he prioritized saving his own ass, he’d be the worst hero ever.”

“Why do you suddenly sound so skeptical of him? I thought you liked the Phantom Thieves,” Goro asked, noticing how Ren couldn’t even focus on picking the right kind of coffee. Something was off about him. 

“Sorry, it’s just… I don’t like the thought of you being in danger,” he let out a defeated sigh. “Something happening to the person I love is the last thing I want.”

“Oh,” he let out a quiet sound. “I apologize. I haven’t considered this.” 

“Don’t apologize. Just start looking after your own ass better,” Ren said. “I can’t follow you everywhere to protect you.”

“I don’t need that. Please, stop making me sound incompetent.” 

Ren just rested his forehead against the shelf, as if choosing this instead of facepalming. “I wasn’t trying to, but I’m sorry.”

“Apology accepted. Now stop staring at that shelf. You’re keeping your favourite customer waiting.” 

The black-haired man snorted quietly before finally reaching for the right container, but even before he grabbed it, he let out a hiss and retreated his arm. 

Goro wasn’t surprised. That’s actually the reaction he was trying to get out of him by picking a different coffee than he usually would, one from the top shelf. Just as a way of direct confirmation. 

“I told them they should’ve taken you to the hospital,” he sighed, and that was it. No going back now. 

Ren instantly turned around, his eyes wide with… shock? Fear? It would be funnier if he were holding at that moment. It’d definitely end up on the floor. 

“What... when…” 

“If you’re wondering when I realized the truth, it was a pretty long time ago,” Goro stated. “But if you’re wondering what made me realize, the answer would be a little longer. The dead giveaway would be the fact that you went with my suggestion of going with original ideas for costumes this time, but I already knew at this point. I liked them, by the way. The black coat suited you.” 

“...” 

“There’s more to it. A while ago, when I met Takamaki-san, she seemed nervous when I brought up her being famous. If the only reason for her being famous was her modeling career, she wouldn’t have any reason to panic, right? Later I confirmed that Ann Takamaki is, indeed, a member of the Phantom Thieves. She looked pretty impressive as Captain Marvel, I have to admit.” 

“...”

“What else… When I accidentally admitted to finding Joker attractive, you behaved as if I actually complimented you instead. You also insisted that he must like me. Which he most likely does, if we assume you two are the same person.”

“...”

“The last thing… I don’t think anyone would take a bullet for me. Other than the man who already said he’d do it once.”

Ren didn’t reply to any of this. Instead, he stormed towards the stairs, not even giving Goro a chance to stop him. 

He expected this. He also knew that the attic didn’t have door, so it’s not like Ren could lock him out and refuse to listen to him… but at the same time, he didn’t want this to be even more stressful to him than necessary, so he sat down on the last step, not looking at him. To give him some space. 

“What else do you-” 

“Shhh, Ren. I’m not your enemy. Why do you think I never sold you out, despite knowing?” 

“I don’t know. I have literally no idea, Goro,” he muttered from the direction of the old mattress. “I was lying to you the entire time, and I don’t even have any excuse.”

“You do, but you don’t think they’re enough.” 

“What are they, then?”

“Not wanting to get arrested, for starters,” Goro laughed, even though there was nothing to laugh about. “I’m still a detective, even if I’m dating a thief. The other one would be… continuing this game, so we can both enjoy ourselves.”

“How can you say this so casually? Aren’t you mad at me? I was deceiving you and talking about wanting you to trust me at the same time!” 

It was probably the first time Ren raised his voice since the beginning of their relationship.

“I was talking about not wanting you to pretend in front of me, but I was doing it this entire time!” He continued, standing up and walking up to Goro, then dropping to his knees. “I’m a total hypocrite…”

“Yes, you are,” Goro agreed bluntly, and immediately came to regret it, seeing Ren’s expression. “For not telling me about your secret identity, yes. But I never felt like you’re pretending to be someone you’re not when with me.”

“Huh?” 

“Why are you thinking of yourself so lowly though? Being jealous of your own alter ego because you think you’re not interesting enough for me, that’s what bothers me more.” He reached out to cradle Ren’s face and make him look at him. “With a costume, or without it. You became the hero you needed when you were younger. I wish you’d see it when you look at yourself.” 

“Goro…” 

“This is why you never told me. You thought the magic of Joker would be gone if I connected the dots.” He sighed, taking off Ren’s glasses without a warning and putting them on the floor. “These are fake, right? With this, the last of your masks is gone. I caught the Joker. Who are you?” 

“...” 

“If you can’t answer, I’ll tell you. I’ve spent enough time with you to know you’re not boring. After all, I didn’t fall in love with Joker, but with Ren, the person you really are.” 

“You think you’re so smooth.” He let out a broken laugh, bringing one hand to his eyes and trying to wipe away the tears which Goro tried not to comment on. “Say it again.” 

“Come on, that’s my line.”

Circling his left arm around Goro’s neck, he pulled himself closer.

“Please. I need to hear it.” 

“Just kidding. I love you, Ren.” He smiled, and a moment later Ren was kissing him, and he kissed back, as if this whole mess was just an innocent joke. There was probably a better place for that than the dusty attic floor, but Goro didn’t want to pull away. It was fine. 

At least until they lost their balance and landed on their sides. 

“Ow…” Ren uttered, then sighed. “At least it wasn’t the right arm…”

“You’re going to wash this coat for me though, it’s covered in dirt now.”

“I can wash all the clothes you’re wearing right now if you decide to spend the night at my place again. You can wear mine instead.” 

“You know what? I might accept the offer,” he said, moving closed to kiss him again, because now that no dark secrets were in the way, he could do it, without worrying about anything anymore. They’d probably still be viewed as rivals by everyone else, but the two of them knew the truth. “Ren? Do you still have all those cosplays?” 

“Some of them. Why are you asking?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

Goro still wasn’t sure how he ended up like this, but it honestly wasn’t too bad.

**Author's Note:**

> no beta we die like men 
> 
> Still, big thanks to anyone who decided to read this story!! I finally managed to write something for the pairing that has been consuming my life for the past half a year, and even if it's a little silly, I'm happy to share it.


End file.
